The School of Charm: Books 1-5 Page 7

  She laughed when he arched his brows, prompting her for a response. “Admit it,” he said. “You believe in the fairy tales—true love, happily ever afters—all that hogwash.”

  “I did once,” she admitted. Her mind wandered back to her childhood. Back when she and her mother had dreamt of balls, and her debut in society, and yes…perhaps even finding a love match. Now it all felt so far away, like the fairy tales Tolston had mentioned.

  “Not anymore?” he asked.

  She shook her head with a sad smile. “Not anymore.”

  He studied her for a moment. “You are too young to be so cynical.”

  She shrugged that off easily. “Perhaps.”

  His nostrils flared as a flicker of anger crossed his face. “Whoever took your dreams from you ought to pay.”

  Her eyes widened in surprise, and then she realized what he must have assumed. “I did not mean it like that,” she said. “My heart was never broken by anything other than grief. I merely meant…” She threw her hands out at a loss for the right words. “I merely meant, now I know that love is a luxury few can afford.”

  He met her gaze evenly, searching for what? She knew not. Finally, he tipped his head in acknowledgement. “On that, we agree.”

  She shifted, unfolding her feet and leaning toward the warmth of the fire, which put her at eye level with him as he continued to rest his elbows on his knees. They were huddled together so closely like they were about to whisper a secret. Maybe that was what gave her the courage—or the audacity, to blurt out the question that popped into her mind. “Are you not holding out for a love match, then?”

  He sat upright with a shocked laugh.

  “I’m so sorry,” she said quickly. “That is none of my business. It’s just that everyone is talking about the fact that you haven’t wed yet, and—”

  “No need to apologize,” he said. “You may ask me what you will. We are hardly strangers by now, wouldn’t you agree?”

  She bit her lip because she didn’t know how to answer. His question made her think, and thinking made reality come back to her with a vengeance. For a little while there she’d forgotten herself, her circumstances, her worries…but now?

  Were they strangers? No.

  But that hardly made them friends.

  “No, my lord,” she said quietly as she straightened in her seat, folding her hands primly in her lap. “We are not strangers. But I am still only your maid—”

  “You were my maid,” he interrupted sharply. “Now you are my…”

  He trailed off as his gaze met hers and held. She found herself holding her breath as she waited to see how he would finish. What was she to him?

  What could she be?

  “My charge,” he said with finality. “You, Miss Adelaide, are my charge.”

  Chapter Six

  There were few things Alec hated more than uncomfortable furniture that was too delicate to be used. Unfortunately, the school’s official visiting room was filled with just that. For the ladies who surrounded him, the furniture looked perfect. A handful of petite, pretty young debutantes smiled at him beguilingly.

  Well, not Miss Adelaide. Addie, she’d told him to call her the other night, but thinking of her as Miss Addie Adelaide still made him smile even as it frustrated the life out of him that he did not know her true identity.

  He could find out.

  Gregory was just awaiting word to go see Miss Emmaline Haversham.

  So why hadn’t Alec sent him to get some answers? He wasn’t quite sure of that himself. Possibly because he’d rather hoped Miss Adelaide would come clean with those answers herself. That she might trust him enough to share her secrets.

  But in the three days that had passed since he’d left her and Reggie with Miss Grayson, he’d gotten none.

  Of course, he’d spent no time alone with her since then, either. He had seen her, though. Every day. The fact that he now recognized every smiling debutante in the room was mildly embarrassing. The fact that they were so familiar with him was even more so.

  By all accounts, he was here to see Miss Grayson, as a friend and as one of the patrons of this school. Most of the girls came from wealthy families who could afford to pay a great fee to have their daughters taught by the best. Or, in some cases, he suspected—merely have a safe place to keep the young ladies out of sight and out of mind.

  But, as designed by Lord Charmian’s kind wife, there were some spots left open for ladies without such funds. He and a few others shared that burden. Miss Grayson, in particular, had felt strongly that they should open their doors to young ladies who were at a disadvantage. Ones who suffered from their parents’ scandals, or who came from families whose funds had gone dry, or those who had fallen through the cracks, as she’d put it. The ones who were neither marriageable nor on the shelf, not fit for service but not able to run their own homes either.

  It was these ladies who Miss Grayson made a point of helping, which was how he’d known that his friend would never turn Miss Adelaide away.

  The child, on the other hand—well, the child was the reason for his visit today.

  “All right, ladies,” Miss Grayson called out as she entered the room. “I believe Mr. Reynolds is waiting for you all in the ballroom.”

  He heard the redhead next to him sigh. “I am hopeless with dancing.”

  Miss Louisa Purchase, he recalled. Second daughter of The Viscount of Torrent. Alec wasn’t certain she was talking to him, but he felt someone ought to acknowledge her misery. “I am told anyone can learn.”

  She pulled a face that made him laugh. “Whoever said that never met me.”

  He leaned over slightly as the other girls got to their feet, chattering amongst themselves. “Trust me. If I could be taught to dance without embarrassing myself, then anyone can do it.”

  Her eyes widened in surprise before she laughed. “Addie told me you were nicer than you looked, but I didn’t believe it until now.”

  He sat back in shock. She took it wrong, her face crumbling with apology. “Oh I am sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.” She clapped a hand over her mouth and mumbled something about being abominably rude.

  He waved her apologies aside. “I can promise you, it takes far more than that to offend me.” Indeed, he was actually feeling quite…pleased. He found himself fighting a smile as he watched her scurry off to join her friends.

  So, Miss Adelaide had been talking about him.

  He felt like a fool. He was a fool. He couldn’t even bring himself to meet Miss Grayson’s gaze when they were left alone, with none but the dozing housekeeper as chaperone.

  Only a child would be feeling this ridiculously giddy joy over the mere fact that a young lady had spoken well of him. Nicer than he looked. That was hardly high praise, now was it?

  And yet…what was this feeling that had his lips desperately trying to curve up despite his best efforts to squelch them.

  Happiness, plain and simple.

  Ugh. He was thoroughly disgusted with himself.

  “Are you quite all right, Lord Tolston?” Miss Grayson asked.

  He sniffed and finally managed to get a handle on his errant smile. Was he all right? No. And he hadn’t been ever since a certain young lady swooned in his arms. A young lady who’d been determinedly avoiding any private conversations with him ever since he’d left her at this school.

  Easy to do, certainly. Private encounters with eligible gentlemen was hardly encouraged at this school for young ladies, but even so…he knew Miss Adelaide well enough to know that if she’d wanted to speak with him, she would have.

  And she hadn’t.

  Each day she’d been the first one out the door when his visits had come to an end. Today she hadn’t even shown up with the other young ladies.

  “Where is she?” he asked Miss Grayson now, skipping any niceties because with a friend like Miss Grayson, they were hardly necessary.

  As if to prove his point, she merely smiled in response to his abrupt questio
n. “Miss Adelaide, you mean?”

  He gave a grunt in lieu of a yes. Miss Grayson was toying with him, albeit in the most subtle manner.

  Anyone who did not know the beautiful Miss Grayson would probably not even know she was having fun at his expense.

  “She is with Reggie,” Miss Grayson said. “The poor boy was sick last night, and she stayed up with him all night.”

  He came to his feet. “Where are they?”

  Miss Grayson’s brows arched. “You do not honestly believe I’d let you go to the ladies’ private quarters, now do you, Lord Tolston?”

  He glared at her, his heart racing uncomfortably at the thought of Miss Adelaide in distress. Even odder, he found he hated the thought of the boy being ill. It was ridiculous. He barely knew the child. But the boy was important to Miss Adelaide. He was a part of her…

  And somehow, she had become incredibly important to Alec.

  He’d been telling Gregory, Miss Grayson, and anyone else who would listen that his keen interest in Miss Adelaide and her child was solely born out of obligation. She’d been in his employment, after all. He’d helped her when she’d fallen ill. Surely it was his duty to look after her. Her happiness fell under his concerns.

  That was what he said. But he was starting to suspect that this desire to see to her welfare went beyond duty and obligation.

  “I wish to see her,” he said, doing his best to remain calm and collected…something that had never been an issue for him before Miss Adelaide had come along.

  Miss Grayson eyed him oddly. “I’ll have one of the girls fetch her.”

  “Leave her be if she is resting,” he said, but Miss Grayson had already slipped out and returned with a small smile. “Your ward shall be here shortly.”

  Your ward. He cringed at the words. By the way Miss Grayson pressed her lips together to smother a smile, he suspected she knew it. Addie wasn’t his ward, she was merely his…his…

  Oh blast if he knew what she was to him anymore.

  She was his responsibility, that much he knew for certain. But she was also becoming so much more. Something dangerously more.

  Miss Grayson sank gracefully into the seat across from his. “To what do we owe the honor of your visit today, my lord?”

  Oh yes, she was teasing him. It was rather odd that he’d come to visit so often, that he could not deny.

  He toyed with the saucer in his hands, the cup long since emptied of its contents. “I wanted to check on the situation with the boy.”

  “Reggie?” she asked, as if there was another orphan boy taking up residence here. “I’m afraid I have not had a chance to speak with Lady Charmian yet.” Her expression called him a fool so eloquently, there was no need for words.

  She’d avoided saying anything to Miss Adelaide—they’d agreed it would do no one any good to get her hopes up—but they hoped that Lady Charmian would agree to allow Reggie to stay on here until he was old enough to be sent to a boarding school.

  Alec had already offered to foot the bill for the child’s schooling when the time came, and by that point Miss Adelaide would have been at the School of Charm long enough to learn all the skills necessary to gain employment. They might not know who her family was, but if her parents were deceased and there was no one searching for her to claim her… He and Miss Grayson were both of the mind that they allow her the chance to start again here at the school.

  With the backing of himself and Lady Charmian, she might be able to find a position as a companion or even a governess or—

  “Have you discussed the other option with her?” Miss Grayson’s voice was gentle and filled with compassion as they shared a silent exchange. She meant options for Reggie. Whether she might be swayed to part with him so she might find a life for herself.

  No one who’d seen Miss Adelaide with her boy would think that she’d be willing to part with the boy. It was clear that she’d go to any lengths to keep Reggie at her side. But anyone with an ounce of sense knew that her options would forever be severely limited should she opt to keep him.

  “That was what I was hoping to discuss with her today,” he said.

  Miss Grayson nodded as the door opened and Addie entered, her head tucked down as she avoided his gaze.

  “Then I shall leave you to it.” Miss Grayson nodded toward the elderly housekeeper. “Mrs. Brown shall keep you company.”

  The old lady gave a loud snore to emphasize the point.

  Miss Grayson touched Miss Adelaide’s shoulder on her way out and then...they were alone.

  Well, alone aside from a sleeping chaperone.

  Miss Adelaide dipped into a curtsy, holding the edges of a dark blue gown that did not fit her well since it was borrowed, but still a vast improvement from that brown shroud. “Good afternoon, Lord Tolston,” she murmured.

  “How is Reggie?”

  She lifted her head, her brows rising in surprise. “Better. Thank you for your concern.”

  He moved toward her, noting how she stiffened. Was she nervous around him? Perhaps their conversation the other night had been too intimate. Definitely far too improper. And yet, he had never touched her.

  So how was it that he felt closer to this woman than to any former lover? Whatever had transpired between them in the dark of night made him feel more beholden to her, more connected to her…

  And yet, she’d done nothing but keep her distance ever since.

  He looked down at the ground. Rightfully so. She had no place in his life. He was on the hunt for a countess, everyone knew that. And no one was less fitting than a fallen woman with an illegitimate child.

  Not to mention the fact that he still did not know her name.

  She had not trusted him enough to tell him.

  Her hands clenched at her sides, and he waited patiently for her to speak. She was summoning her courage to say something, and he’d be damned if he let his impatience get the better of him.

  “What will happen to him?” she finally blurted out.

  “Miss Adelaide, I—”

  “Addie, please,” she said with a quick shake of her head. “Please let us be friends and speak plainly.”

  He hated the desperation in her voice. “What has Miss Grayson told you?”

  She bit her lip with another shake of her head. “Only that I need to be patient. That I ought to trust her and Lady Charmian, but…” She sighed wearily. “How am I to do that? Miss Grayson has been so very kind to me, especially given the circumstances. But she barely knows me, and Lady Charmian has never even met me. I have no reason to trust them, nor they me.”

  The words seemed to come out in a tumble, and he couldn’t stop himself from rushing forward to comfort her. Pulling her into his arms, even as he told himself this was wrong. So very wrong.

  And yet when she collapsed against him, her head resting against his chest—nothing had ever felt so right.

  “You can trust them,” he said quietly, his breath rustling the fine hair. This close he could smell her scent, so warm and inviting. He could feel her small frame against his, and the way she fit felt like heaven on earth. Like she’d been made to press against him, to be his comfort, and he her support.

  He brushed his lips against her hair, telling himself all the while that he ought to let her go. That this was unseemly and ungentlemanly, and yet he could not stop himself from holding her tight. She shivered a bit against him, but she didn’t pull away. She tilted her head back so those sparkling blue eyes were fixed on him. “I don’t know who to trust.”

  “But you trust me,” he said. It came out on a low growl, some primitive instinct needing to hear her say it.

  “Yes,” she whispered. “I trust you.”

  “Then come to the ball I’m hosting.”

  Her eyes widened, and she stumbled back a step. “Pardon me?”

  He drew in a deep breath, steeling himself for what he had to say. What he’d come here to say. “Are you familiar with Lady Rothby?”

  She blinked. “The V
iscount of Rothby’s wife?”

  He nodded and she shook her head no.

  “She’s a patroness of St. Anthony’s,” he said slowly, keeping his voice low, gentle. “It’s a school—”

  “It’s an orphanage.” Her face had gone pale, her lips thinning into a straight line.

  “Yes,” he said. “It’s an orphanage. Lady Rothby takes great pride in their—”

  “No.” Her eyes snapped with anger as she tilted her chin up with pride. “I will not give up Reggie.”

  He did not try to fight her. He couldn’t have argued in the face of her firm conviction even though he’d told himself time and again on the way over here that this would be for the best. He had a list of reasons why she ought to at least consider adoption.

  Marriage was one of them. She might have a chance of marrying and starting a new family one day if she were to renounce the illegitimate child. Not a marriage to a gentleman, perhaps, but he was certain that with her youth and beauty, she could find a good match with an upstanding man.

  The thought was no more tolerable now than when he’d said the same to Gregory over supper last night. His cousin had stared at him nonplussed over his roast as Alec had given a fine speech about the myriad of life choices that would open for Miss Adelaide should she heed his wisdom.

  Even then the words had rung false—they’d tasted like charcoal in his mouth—but he’d ignored the ache they’d caused in his chest.

  Now, standing here before her, he could barely maintain eye contact. His mind rattled off reasons why this would be best, but those reasons seemed to wither beneath her fierce glare.

  Her eyes sparked with lightning. “I am certain you mean well, Lord Tolston, but I will not be parted from my…my son.” She seemed to stumble over the words but her chin tilted up even higher. “I will leave here, if necessary, but I will not—”

  “Now wait just a moment,” he said, holding his hands out to calm her. “Do not even think of running away merely because I suggested you consider all your options.”

  She glared at him, and he had to fight a surge of amusement at the wicked glimmer in her eyes. He loved her stubborn streak beyond reason, and the fact that she could stand up to him even when he towered over her with a fierce glower of his own made his heart trip over itself as it tried to race away from him.